THE PHONE OFF

While rush-jogging out of work the other day, I realized—just before I got to my bus stop—that I was without my phone, so I re-ran back my steps to see if I’d dropped it.  I arrived at my work intersection to see my phone in the crosswalk I’d just hurried across.  A monster of a car was galloping towards it.  In slow-motion I yelled, “Nooooooooo!”, but before my phone could realize what was happening to it, it was devoured by the wheels of the beast—and phone crumbs soared in all directions!

Okay, then.

Luckily, my 3-year phone contract with Bell was recently expired, so I was in a good position to get a good deal on a new phone.  Indeed, I was a free agent, so I set out to play Bell against Rogers in a battle for my customering.  First, Bell was rung, and after 2 hours of negotiation (okay 1.75 hours of that was with their hold music), I’d acquired an excellent offer.

Onto Rogers to see what they could do:

“So,” I said, “Bell offered me this—can you do any better?”

“Oh,” Roger Rogers said (approximately), “that is a very good deal—probably because you’ve been with them for so long—no way we can beat that.”

So I phoned Bell back and told them that they didn’t actually need to give me such a good rate, because their competition wasn’t close to stealing me away.

2 thoughts on “THE PHONE OFF”

  1. Yikes, poor little phone.

    My rear bike light suffered a similar fate a number of years ago, electing to end it all by vehicular suicide.

    The first few cars missed it, and I was becoming hopeful that I could dart out to retrieve, when a large truck scored a direct hit. Almost worth the $9.95 to witness that satisfying crunch of plastic being seriously pulverized. Ka-bloooey!

  2. Well described, Tarrin. Thank you for sharing your experience to help me recover from mine. Yes, I suppose there is a satisfaction that can come from watching a small piece of powerful technology meet a bigger technology’s maker. Our action movie viewing has taught us the aesthetic beauty of such destruction. My only complaint, then, is that these real-life collisions don’t come in slow motion, along with perhaps multiple repeat angles set to an exciting musical score.

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